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From 1845 to the end of the century, the United States attempted to overthrow more than 40 foreign governments and to crush more than 30 populist movements fighting against insufferable regimes. In the process, the U.S. bombed about 25 countries, caused the end of life for several million people, and condemned many millions more to a life of agony and despair. If I were the president, I could stop terrorist attacks against the United States in a few days. Permanently. I would first apologize -- very publicly and very sincerely -- to all the widows and orphans, the tortured and impoverished, and all the many millions of other victims of American imperialism. Then I would announce that American's global interventions have come to an end and inform Israel that it is no longer the fifty-first state of the union but -- oddly enough -- a foreign country. I would then reduce the military budget by at least 90 percent and use the savings to pay reparations to our victims and repair the damage from our bombings. ... That's what I'd do on my first three days in the White House. On the fourth day, I'd be assassinated. |